Is Your Husband Cheating? Know the Warning Signs
Suspicious behavior has led you to believe your husband could be cheating. It might just be paranioa on your part, but it might not. Has your husband taken up extracurricular activities outside of the marital bed? Of course, there may be other reasons for the changes you're noticing. Your relationship may be in trouble, your partner may be going through something challenging, or perhaps boredom or monotony has put a rift between you. The goal is to find out what's really happening here, and then take steps to either work on your marriage or move on.
Here are some tipoffs that your husband may be having an affair.
His bedside manner has changed.
While cheating wives are more likely to show a lack of interest in sex with their marital partner, it can really go either way with cheating husbands. This may be because it's more difficult for a woman to be intimate with two people at the same time (although ultimately it's going to depend on the individual and their personality). If your husband is carrying on with another woman, he may have less time, energy and interest in having sex with you. Excuses like "I'm exhausted from work" may become more common, or your husband may avoid hugging, kissing, or putting the moves on you.
On the other hand, a cheating husband can also show an increased appetite for sex, maybe because his new playmate has him thinking about it more often. In this case, watch for signs like a change in kissing style, new foreplay techniques he seems to have picked up out of nowhere, or perhaps he is able to last longer because this is his second (third? fourth??) release of the day. But of course, don't assume that your hubby's new tricks come from a negative source. It could be that he's simply experiencing a spike in desire and is looking to spice things up with a little experimentation. Your goal is to learn the truth before making accusations.
He finds more excuses to be away from you for long periods of time.
Sudden, unexpected business trips that keep him away for days on end. Long stretches of time where he claims to have been "out running errands" yet is oddly unreachable by cell phone. Late nights spent working at the office, with infrequent or no check-ins. Dinners out with "colleagues" that seem to last for hours. Sure, it's possible that new pressure at his job has been taking your husband away from his family responsibilities lately; but it's also possible that these excuses are just a cover-up for an extramarital affair.
Is your suspicion of a cheating husband justified? Look for other telltale clues, such as evasive responses to direct questions and an unwillingness to share with you the details of his alleged wanderings. Be on the alert for inconsistencies in his stories - you may even want to keep a running log of his reported activities so you can "fact check" them later. For example, if he says he plans to drive to a city that's 90 miles away for business, then sneak a peek at the mileage on his car before he leaves and upon his return. Look for receipts, credit card and bank statements as proof of his comings and goings. Generally, if your husband has nothing to hide, he will be open with you about where he's been, who he was with and what happened - and the paper trail will support his claims.
He's emotionally unavailable.
If your husband is cheating on you, he may be desperate to justify his actions. This is a good time to convince himself that you're a "bad wife" or the "wrong" woman for him. He may be less willing to share with you the intimate details of his life with you; not only because many of them are conducted in secret, but also because this will allow him to emotionally detach in the same way that he has already physically detached. The fact is, relating takes time, mental and physical energy, and emotional investment. If he's become intimate with another woman on the side, then he likely doesn't have enough to go around.
If your cheating husband has reached the point where he really wants out of the marriage but is afraid to verbalize it, he may look for passive-aggressive means of communicating this. Don't be surprised if he finds any and every excuse to be short with you - finding fault with everything you say or do. It's his way of driving a deeper wedge between you, and removing the blame from himself (which is really where it belongs for being dishonest and unfaithful).
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